NaNoWriMo Has Started

As with every November 1st, I am knee deep in words. 50,000 words in 30 days is challenging but fun. Though this year is hard. Not only has my 19 year old son decided to stay with me until he can find an apartment my daughter is having depression issues as well. Here's the rundown:

Kiddo-1 moved in with a girl he knew for only 2 months, that lasted 2 weeks. He is bipolar, un-medicated at that. He's not really being adultish, tossing fits when I tell him he has to buy things for the house or help with bills. My place looks like a tornado went thru here and the mess is causing my to lash out. Typical OCD/Bipolar even with meds. My dishes were ALL dirty yesterday and a friend came over and did them. This hadn't happened since kiddo-1 moved out.

Kiddo-2 is having episodes of depression and anxiety. She is now medicated, something I never thought I'd have to do with her. It's for the best I know but at first I felt like a failure. Her grades dropped for a few weeks. She is now back on track and it makes me feel better and she feels better.

For me it's stressful having kiddo-1 here but I can't let him sleep in his car. I am making it work the best I can. My issues are that I can't keep anything clean, can't write when kiddos are floating around this small 2 bedroom apartment and I have no space with kiddo-1's things all over the place. Add in that I have had to fill out paperwork for an apartment for him... in the building next to mine. He bitches when I have him sign papers. I had the offer to move back to the 3 bedroom but I can't handle an un-medicated bipolar in my home. All that is needed for him to move in is a bank statement and the apartment to be cleaned and painted. Hoping for move in date in 2 weeks if not sooner. Then I have to call the church and see if they can help with the deposit for him. All this and my normal issues, writing tons of words this month and trying to feed 3 when I have barely enough to feed 2. I tore a muscle and tendon in my shoulder so I have to be careful with my dominant arm.

Grocery shopping usually happens on the 2nd, today, but kiddo-1 had to work and my ex-mother-in-law broke her shoulder. So now I have to wait until I have a ride and someone to help carry everything in, up to the second floor. We have an apartment inspection next week which means I must clean the place OCD style and make sure we can find everything.

Now for my NaNoWriMo WIP (work in progress)... I'm ahead on it and feeling like it's gonna be good. Here's an excerpt....

Lynell was running through the woods as fast as she could carrying her young. She knew they were coming for her, to take the baby away and impregnate her again. They were using females as breeders and sending the young off. After weeks of planning she finally escaped with a few other females, though she hadn’t seen any of them for days. Another branch smacked her in the face while holding the little one as close to her body as she could. Stopping near a small stream Lynell inhaled trying to smell if they were still following her and if so how close. Sighing in relief, Lynell walked to the edge of the water. Setting the little one down on soft sandy bank, she drank the water as fast as she could. Not knowing when it’ll be available again. The water was icy since it was still spring and made her feel hopeful, if only for a second.
The little one started wailing, he was hungry. Lynell picked him up and put him to her breast. It was a good thing, she thought, that there was no looking for his food. She washed the cloth she was using as a diaper. Once done she closed her eyes hoping to get an hours rest. 
When Lynell woke, the sun had begin to peek over the horizon, she had slept for hours. Quickly feeding the little one she took off running again. With the sleep she got she was energized but had allowed those chasing her to get closer to her. Not that she knew if they were still after her. She couldn’t take the chance. 
Coming across an abandoned shed, Lynell hurried inside and found a old dusty bed. Knowing she shouldn’t leave the little one alone but needed to find herself some food; she placed him down and quietly left. It didn’t take her long to find water again. Shifting for the first time in days she managed to catch a few rabbits and returned to the shed in less than half an hour. Shifting back she curled up with the little one and fell asleep.

***********

An early morning run was one of Drew’s favorite things to do, plus he had to patrol his land. As Alpha of a small pack he needed to. After his relocation the Council, the ruling wolves, demanded; he was still getting used to the land and smells. Over three months and now the scents changed with spring coming. New growth, melting snow and more animals running around. When he first caught the scent he thought it was just a regular wolf or fox. Inhaling deeper he found it to be a wolf shifter. One not of his pack. Following the trail it led off his property. No shifter was allowed into an Alpha’s territory without permission, so he followed it. Just because his land ended didn’t mean his territory did. Five miles off property the scent was strong, only seconds old. Speeding up he lost it and ended up backtracking. Near an old falling down shed the scent was strong and the wolf was still there. That’s when he heard it, a baby cry. What the hell would a wolf bring a human baby out here, he thought. 
Shifting and slowly approaching the shed he, caught the scent, the baby was no human but a wolf pup. He didn’t want to scare the female, females were very protective of their young and she would try and fight him. Looking into what once held a window he saw a young female sleeping with the pup in her arms. She looked dirty and must have been exhausted because she hadn’t woken to his presence or the pup crying. 
Drew walked around to the door and crept in. Once standing above the female he used his Alpha commanding voice, “Get up!”
She jumped grabbing the pup and holding it close. Without looking up she tried to run. Drew cut her off and growled. She immediately dropped to her knees.
“What is your name female? And what are you doing in my territory?”
He watched the female clutch the pup even closer, almost squishing it to death.
“I am Lynell Lora Pritt, Alpha. I didn’t know I was in your territory, Alpha.”
“What are you doing out here with a pup so young?” He had noticed the pup was barely whelped or born as humans call it.
“Please don’t send me back, I beg of you.”
“What are you talking about? Your Alpha doesn’t know you left?”
“Please don’t. He’ll take my pup and mate me again.”
Drew was trying to put her words together so he understood them. Was she really saying her Alpha was raping her and steeling the pups? It was against law to mate with one under the age of twenty-two. This female was barely eighteen if he was judging correctly.
“Come, you need a shower, clean clothes and a meal.”
“You won’t send me back, Alpha?”
“Not until you tell me everything. Now come.”
He led led her back to the Alpha house. They didn’t talk. He was still trying to wrap his head around what she had said. Why would an Alpha do what she said? Was her story true or was it a lie. Usually he could sense a lie but she smelled of dirt and the forest. 
Zaran, his Beta, was approaching and he saw Lynell hug the pup closer as if it would be taken from her. 
“That’s just my Beta. You are safe.”
As Zaran stood before them, “Alpha, what is going on?”
“I’m not sure yet. For now we are protecting this female and her pup.”
“Very well. I’ll continue your patrol.”
“Good.” Zaran left and Drew ushered Lynell inside. The kitchen smelled of sausage, eggs, bacon and toast. Aisley was cooking breakfast. He had brought Aisley with him when he was moved. She had been his house female for years. The second she saw Lynell and the pup she rushed around the island.
(c) 2016 Jessica Dewater

Have a great month and enjoy life's little things!

NaNoWriMo Prep in Full Swing

Prepping for NaNoWriMo is hard for a pantser. With each step I want to write. I have my Aeon Timeline & Scrivener all set up. With each plot I come up with I get excited and want to write again. Research is done, as much as I can anyway. I think I learned more about weapons from the 1700's & 1800's than I learned about science in math in high school.

Here is my main planner steps.

• Figure out if it will be one of my series.
• Figure out what characters will be bouncing around. 
• Find character pictures for inspiration
• Make a playlist to get motivated
• Research whatever I think is needed.
• Try and find characters that will be in but on the sidelines.
• Take notes when something comes to mind.
• Name characters.
• Make out bios and back history for characters if needed.
• Plan meals.
• Plan snacks for my long days of writing.
• Get house cleaned so no distractions. 
• Set time limits for Facebook, Twitter, etc.
• Try not to write (hard as heck).

Here is what I wrote when I got up this morning. It has nothing to do with NaNoWriMo but I was inspired. It is political so beware. I usually don't post about politics but this one just came to me.

Morning Thoughts

I am NOT normal so this post won't be either.
HYPOTHETICALLY in the future....
Lets say I just got out of bed, my brain wanted to grab a penis. Not sure who's penis but non the less a penis.
Now lets say I actually left the house and saw a hot sweaty, sexy half dressed guy with a penis (most guys have them). This guy is just walking along, well more like strutting (you get the point). Say I walk over to him say 'Hi' & grab his penis. He doesn't like it and calls the police.
"Miss, what do you think you were doing? You can't go around grabbing a man's junk."
"Officer, President Donald Trump said grabbing pussy was okay so I grabbed me some penis."
"That is not what he said."
"Officer, I have all of his debates on my computer, a USB and burned to a disc."
"What you did was sexual harassment not 'locker room talk'."
"I see a half dressed sweaty guy right." I point to the guy. "He was just in a man's locker room, at least it looks like it to me."
"I see your point, you may go."
This teaches us that t's a two way street.
Just think men who want Trump as president, a disgusting drugged up female may just walk up to you and grab your penis. She'd get away with it.
Women just think a nasty, dirty, drugged out guy could walk up to you daughters and grab them some pussy and of course he'd get away with it.
Get your heads out of your asses and see the truth.

That's it for politics.

Now to planning more. I want to get a few more secondary characters bios done. So off I go.

August & September Sucked!

I thought all my problems had been lessened, but NO! I've had more stress, rage & anxiety in the past 4 weeks than I have all year.
My son's grandmother got all pissed off because wanted to take a trip to Ohio from Christmas/Solstice. I was called every name you can think of, told I ruined my kids' lives and never to contact 'MY SON'. My son, the good man he is now, confronted her and she kicked him out. The next day after leaving me tons of nasty messages, she went to his work. Yep his work. Begged him to come back. He did but put a deposit down on an apartment before he did. She is now leaving messages saying that I ruined his life and he can't live on his own... Ha! He's 19 for crying out loud.
It took me weeks to realize that nothing was my fault and I raised a responsible, respectful young man.With that all settled, I will be changing my phone number when my son moves into his apartment the 1st of October. I have no need to contact her or vise versa.
My therapist told me I am doing the right thing. My shrink added another medication to help me sleep more since the one I was on wasn't helping.

That was all of August... now for September

My daughter came home last Sunday, didn't say one word to me the entire night. Monday she came home from school early because she was so depressed she couldn't stand it. After an hour she finally opened up and told me what happened. Her father told her & her sister that he was doing meth. Yeppers, meth. My 1st thought was why the hell did he tell a 18 and 14 year old this. Then the rage set in. I wanted to kick his ass into next year. I held it together until I was alone. My daughter and I talked about it all, how she was feeling, what options she had and what she wanted me to do.
I told her that if she and her sister wanted I would call the police, they still haven't decided. Though they agreed to have no contact with him. I called my daughter's therapist and she saw her Friday. Her therapist said I did everything and more than a mother should do. Since I had felt helpless all week this made my week. My daughter doesn't need medication right now and she talked about it.  I have to admit, I spoiled her most of the week. Made her favorite foods, cuddled with her and kept telling her that what her father was doing was NOT her fault.
The weekend got better because a guy I have been crushing on since I was younger came over and we had a great weekend.
This next week should be awesome, it's homecoming week here and my daughter is excited. They have different silly dress-up days all week and the dance on Saturday. It's her first year in high school so it's a big deal. I asked her if she was going with a boy. Her answer was, 'Why? I don't need one to go to a dance. I'm going alone so I can show them all what they are missing and will never have.' That's my girl.

Better Days!

This last week was stressful and emotional. I felt like everything was crashing around me. My health, my mental well-being and of course that effected my moods and house.

With chiropractor appointment, shrink, dentist, grocery shopping, therapist and ultrasound of breast my week was overwhelming.
The week before I was angered by the slightest event, the sight of a neighbor, slow loading internet... you get the point. It took all my energy to not hurt someone. After Tuesday with the shrink & adding a new medication to my regimen , I became lethargic & emotional. The rage wasn't there, which was a first in many months. However, anger & anger were.
Thursday, my therapist said she was worried about the anger and rage. Typical!
As Friday started, I cried, screamed and threw things. Since my mammogram came back abnormal I had an ultrasound on my breasts. I cried the whole time. My mom and my grandma died from breast cancer, so it hits hard. After 45 minutes the doctor came in, all is good, but they are going to watch 2 spots. All others are just cysts full of fluid.
*Please get your mammograms. It saves lives*
When I got home I had no idea what to do with the relief that had washed over me. All I could do is sit here and stare at the computer. My daughter had to remind me to eat, that's how far out of it I was.
Now, I'm hoping my next few weeks are calm and my body gets used to my new medication. I need to write more this week as well.

When Characters Change Your Plot

When a writer sits down to begin a story, they have some idea of what should happen. Some even outline the whole story. I can't outline, here's why...

My characters never do what I think they should. In my current WIP my female protagonist has changed into wimp, my hero (the one she was meant to hook up with) changed and of course an issue of location.

Female- She was to be a strong, independent character. Now she is scared of everyone and can't seem to trust anyone.

Hero- He was to be the Alpha of the pack... yep she changed that. The story is turning out that she will end up with one that was suppose to be a secondary character.

Location- It went from the west coast US to central now it looks like it'll end up in south-central US

Many times a character has changed what I thought should happen. At least the antagonist seems to stay the same though internal demons do change.

I really didn't want another story line to end up the male rescues the female type thing. Well, this one might do that and in return she rescues him even without his knowing it.

Okay, I think this is short but I want to get back to my characters because they are calling.

Oops! Too Many WIPs

Today I was organizing my Scrivener files and making sure they were all named by the MC (Main Character). I didn't realize I had so many started and not past the first few chapters. SO, being OCD I decided I will NOT start another one until I finish half of them. I do have 2  I'm editing, which means they are written but need some TLC. You can see them all in the photo here. It's my Scrivener files.

I'm hoping my brain will do as I want it to. It keeps jumping in with new story lines and characters. I guess that's part of being extreme rapid cycling bipolar disorder.

Once I put all my WIP into Aeon Tmeline 2, I found the gaps. That made me even more determined to finish them. I love that I can nest every event in each WIP, I can see where the gaps are. I can open them all and see where I need more stories at the bottom and top.

With taking my max dose of meds and staying inside so I don't have issues with my neighbors; I should have plenty of time after all my appointments. I may not like being forced to stay inside due to my anxiety and bipolar but it doe seem to get me writing and the house clean.


Excerpt of New WIP (Work in Progress).
Remember it is the 1st draft.

Morgan was running through the woods as fast as she could carrying her young. She knew they were coming for her, to take the baby away and impregnate her again. They were using females as breeders and sending the young off. After weeks of planner she finally escaped with a few other females, though she hadn’t seen any of them for days. Another branch smacked her in the face while holding the little one as close to her body as she could. Stopping near a small stream Morgan inhaled trying to smell if they were still following her and if so how close. Signing in relief, Morgan walked to the edge of the water. Setting the little one down on soft sandy bank, she drank the water as fast as she could. Not knowing when it’ll be available again.
© 2016 Jessica Markley

Weight Loss Struggle

Weight is a large problem in the United States. I see many children over weight or obese. It breaks my heart. No days children sit and play video games and eat unhealthy snacks all day and after school. I understand most households have both parents working at least 40 hours a week and I know it's necessary. Quick fast-food, chips, candy and other store bought fast meals are easier and less time-consuming.

My Story

I've been overweight for 13 years, since the birth of my daughter. I have no self-esteem issues but losing weight is something I am working on. It's a struggle since I can not exercise like many programs want you to, nor can I afford the proper food (costs are too high).
I used food to make me feel better when I was depressed. Many people do and I don't judge. I was never into much candy but chips and dip were my go-to food.

After my son was born, fast-food was easier when I was working. It was also easier to plop my son in front of the TV when I was having a depressive day. I was lucky that he had a fast metabolize and didn't gain weight like others would. As for snacks back then it was fruit snacks with all those nasty ingredients. I didn't know what I was doing to my  and my son'd body by doing this.

Once my daughter was born we found out she is allergic to dairy. Bye-bye dip and many of my favorite chips, not to mention most of the boxed cake mixes, brownies and cheesecake. Did you know that pre-packaged sliced meats can have hidden dairy? I didn't either. I had to read every label and found ingredients I couldn't pronounce. That's when it hit me. I was cooking wrong.

I had never allowed my kids to have caffeine nor candy except on special occasions (Halloween).  Back then there wasn't Pinterest or Google so I went to the library and checked out tons of recipe books and tried to make everything from scratch like I learned when I stayed on the farm every summer as a kid. It was hard, time-consuming and expensive. So I went back to fast-food. Though I did make sure there was no dairy in anything. That back-fall was due to the fact I went back to school and started working full-time.

When I was forced to stop working because of my health; I returned to trying to eat healthy. I cut the kids' soda intake to a 12 pack a month and one bag of chips a month. Though I stuck to my Mt.Dew® every day. I started using frozen vegetables instead of cans, fresh cut meats and local produce. I lost a little weight and my kids stayed healthier. Once a month the kids got to choose a fast-food place... Guess what it was. Subway. Talk about healthy eating. Their meat has almost no dairy (depends on what you order).

My son & I suffer from migraine. After some time I found that aspartame was a trigger. It's in tons of things from gum to diet soda. Once I cut it out and taught my kids to look for it our migraines weren't as frequent. Once you read the link above you'll understand. It's terrible on ones body.

The past 3 years I have been more health conscious. I make HOMEMADE crockpot freezer meals. It took some time to find ones both my kids could and would eat. I stopped buying the packets of seasonings (making my own). I cut down on my soda and the only chips I buy are corn chips or SunChips® .

Last summer I jumped into the new fad of fruit infused water. The ones you buy at the store I couldn't drink (caused migraines) so I bought infusion water bottles and started making my own. It surprised me that I drank less soda and smoked less. I also lost around 10 pounds in 3 months. I added fresh smoothies every morning (with spinach & soy protein). Both helped me feel energized. I was able to cut down my mood stabilizer a little bit and stop taking my sleeping medication. (See doctor to change medications).

Of course when winter hit my water intake dropped and more soda was consumed.

I read "Big Girls Do It Running" by Jasinda Wilder a few days ago. She makes it simple and easy to change the way you eat. It's also an easy read and she doesn't toss in a lot of technical babble. You don't have to change everything all at once. Because of Jasinda I got back into my water and smoothies. I have been cooking healthier for years but water intake is important. I plan on keeping up with my water intake and cooking healthy throughout the year this time. In the last few days of drinking the fruit infused water I have seen a change in my energy level. Not much but enough to keep up on housework when I'm not in pain.

In short, I drink homemade fruit infused water, fresh smoothies, fresh & frozen fruits & vegetables. I buy my meat from a meat market and make my own seasonings. I add lots of onions & garlic to my food rather than salt (except baked potatoes). Broccoli is a major vegetable I use. Since my son moved out my daughter & I have been eating vegetable snack.

Our apartment complex has a huge garden this year and I plan on making homemade canned spaghetti sauce, diced tomatoes, tomatoes sauce and of course salsa since the girls love it.

Disclaimer; I'm not a doctor nor am I an expert. If you feel you have weight issues please see a doctor.

Stress of a Bipolar

Never say "I can't get any worse." Because it can. This week has proven it.

Monday I had my yearly mammogram. Yes it hurt, but it's a necessary for me. My son got hurt at work and has cuts & scrapes all over his face, arms and legs.

Tuesday radiology called and said they needed more angles and a ultrsound. I get to wait a week & a half before I can get the tests done.

Wednesday I had my blood tests for everything you can imagine. Found out my PAP from the week before, came back abnormal and I'll have to have them done every 3 months until it's normal. Blood tests are good except my white count cells. Which means I go back on antibiotics & antivirals. This means my bipolar meds and mood stabilizers will work less. I had to send my daughter back to her grandma's because I won't know when an anger episode will hit.

How I'm dealing with it...
I'm not. My mom and paternal grandma died from breast cancer and I'm a cervical cancer survivor.  I can't focus. So far I have watched Charmed since Monday. It's seems to make me feel a bit better.
I have written very little. Though I have plotted several books out, if I ever get to writing again. I'm glad I finished CampNaNoWriMo before all this hit. I managed 30k in 20 days.


There have been a few good things in the last week:
Saturday: My daughter and her friends, my gaggle of giggling girls, spent a night. I love having them here, they talk to me about everything from friends to sex to things they shouldn't do. It makes me feel great they feel they can open up like that to me.
My son and his friend were also here. They were in and out of the apartment but, took me to the store.
Both groups of kids gave me hugs every time they came in and out. Hugs make you feel better.
A good thing is I have the money to pay ALL my bills for next month without borrowing. That relieves some of my stress. I also have a bit in savings still. You can't imagine how much a little thing like being able to pay bills.

Today I felt a little better and made up beef stew in the crockpot.

Writing for Anxiety & Bipolar Disorder

Did you know that writing can help those with bipolar & anxiety?

I didn't believe it either until I checked my moods after each of my writing sessions.
Writing isn't new to me. It took a few weeks until I noticed that my mood levels out as I write. My rage looses it's momentum and my anxiety disappears. I writing novels that I may or may not publish. When people piss me off I write them in and kill them off later. It's not like I would actually kill them but we all have those thoughts at time. I also get to have characters vent about what I would like to without causing a confrontation.

I know that starting out writing can be confusing. 

You don't even know what you want to write. Just start! If you try this let me know how it works for you since not everyone responds to treatments the same way.
You can also start a journal. A journal of your thoughts, feelings, actions, and episodes is can be beneficial when treating bipolar disorder. A journal can also help your doctors and therapists find some of your triggers. Some people find writing in a journal helps to relieve anxiety.

When writing in your journal, you do not have to write in sentences, worry about spelling, or any grammar crap. Just write.

Writing Stories

If you want to try to write stories as I do, they don't have to be researched or very long. Just write what you want the characters to do and feel. Sometimes you'll write characters that feel like you do and if they find a solution you might have a clue for yourself.

*Disclosure: I am not a doctor. This is simply a personal opinion. If you are depressed, manic, have rage episodes please seek a professional doctor's care.

Pokemon Go & Churches

Okay, I'm gonna post about Pokemon Go!
Here is a link I was directed to when reading googling the game to see how many people are bashing it.

http://thewardrobedoor.com/2016/07/churches-pokemon-go.html

It seems some people are all for it, even if they don't play. Many businesses are capitalizing on the game so this article is about Christians doing the same thing. Basically churches! You all should know by now that I am not Christian but other, raised as a Catholic for 15 yrs. I haven't been in a church, besides getting help for bills or helping out with pantries, since 2005 (a funeral).

I see nothing wrong with churches capitalizing on the game. Kids & adults are already going to the Pokestops that happen to be churches, why not talk to them. Many people think ALL churches are pushy, Yeah I have a family member (pastor) that is. This is a good way to get Pokeman GO players to chat, whether it be about the church's god or the game. Show the young ones that church is not to be feared, as I know some think.

In my eyes it's nothing more than something a bar or restaurant does with bands and food specials. Even seems like a good idea for churches to give kids a place to be when they could be out doing naughty things instead, like an after-school program. This article has great ideas (at least I think) about community involvement.

True Christians welcome EVERYONE, whether they believe in their churches god or not. This is a good way for churches to prove that.

That's it for my opinion on this.

New Aeon Timeline

Over the past few weeks I found I wanted to upgrade to Aeon Timeline 2. I love the first version so I used my cigarette money to buy the new version. I can't be happier with my decision. Not only do I smoke less I have another awesome tool to organize my writing and plots.

Downloading Aeon2 (Aeon Timeline 2) was simple. I learned you can keep the first version and projects for them. When saving a current project you can save it as a new one and keep the older version. This is what I have done.

Aeon2 still has the original features such as ability to create your own times (years, dates, etc.), create your own templates, ability to link to sites & pictures, Arcs, ability to see ages of participants in an event, and the ease of navigation

A new feature I like is the different skins available. I'm hooked on the the 'Dark' theme as you can see below.

Picture 1

Aeon2 states the following on features.

*Events are displayed graphically on the timeline with a title, date, and duration, but you can associate a lot of additional meta-data with an event, including colors, tags (keywords), notes, completion status, and other user-definable fields.
*If you give an entity a date of birth, Aeon Timeline will calculate that entity’s age for each event they are associated with, allowing you to quickly see someone’s age at important events in their life.
*In Aeon Timeline 2, you can select which entity type to group by (e.g. Person, Project, Arc, Location).

You can see below that it has a type of nesting, it's called 'Parenting' and 'Dependencies'.  I have not used different Arcs yet except for birth/death and global. Since I'm writing a series, the global Arc keeps the timeline completely visible for me. Later I'll move them to different Arcs, after I have played around more.

Picture 2

Another feature I use a lot is the ability to see ages of  characters at a certain event. This is perfect since my characters' ages span over a million years. Below is an example.

Picture 3

The 'Manage Entities' is great. I can add Arcs & characters. With the characters you can add date of birth and date of death & link it to an event like below. I put all Birth & Dates in their own Arc as in picture 5.

Picture 4

Picture 5

Well, it's time for me to get back to writing. I hope this helps you decide if Aeon2 is right for you.

*Sited from aeontimeline.com

Summer Writing& Update

It's a beautiful summer and what am I doing? Not much. I've kept the house clean and that's about it. No writing and almost no reading, just OCD watching Netflix. I hate when I get in this phase. All I can focus on is the next episode...

CampNaNo is a struggle but I've been trying to get words written. This WIP (work in progress) has a slow start. Not sure how the characters are going to react so planning is not happening. I have set up my Timeline and Scrivener project for it.
I am hoping to finish CampNaNo so I can get the discount to purchase Aeon Timeline 2. It looks great and easier to use.

Now for psyc update....
Due to the drama here at the apartment complex my shrink has me at maximum dosage of all medications. I really wish I could afford to move because I don't think I should have to medicate more than normal because people can't stop gossiping.
I have also been denied disability and I'm in the process of appealing it. More stress. It shouldn't take too long since I have more doctors reports to add and they all say 'You should NOT work. You don't know your rage triggers and may never.'

What reading I have done:
Red Stone Security by Katie Reus
It's not my normal paranormal romance I read but I am hooked. Katie Reus keeps the pace of the plot moving. Each character has a unique history that makes relationships hard.

Tasmina's Heart Excerpt

Tasmina's Heart 

Chapter 1
The monotone professor dragged on about correct punctuation. Tasmina was never able to listen for long. Looking over; she saw that Jackson was sleeping as well as Haylee. Since the start summer term Tasmina had found three friends, something she never thought would happen. They had formed a study group, having most of the same classes. This one, Composition was the worst. Lost in her thoughts, Tasmina didn’t notice that class was over until she saw everyone getting up.
“Tas, you ready for group?” Jackson was the only person to use a nickname for her.
“No, I have to work a few hours. We could meet at the bar and study there.”
“Great, I could eat their buffalo wings forever.” Tasmina noticed that every time the met where she worked Jackson would eat himself into a coma.
“Alright see you later.”
Tasmina walked into work, Takoda’s Bar and Grill, only to be greeted by a few dozen shifters. Great, she had forgotten that The Gathering started today. She had wanted to hide. The Gathering is a get together to find mates. One hadn’t been held in her 19 years of life and she wasn’t participating. In fact she didn’t want to have anything to do with it. It was the reason she had asked her boss, Beta of her pack, to schedule her plenty of hours for the next few weeks. The last thing she wanted was for a male to take interest and command her to mate him. Males just taking females as mates was archaic but it had been done for thousands of years and not much would change. As the fear rippled through her the males could scent it and turned to her. Quickly she made it to Takoda’s office to stash her books and pull her hair up.
“Tasmina, you are an hour early.”
“I came from school.”
“You don’t want to drop your things off at the house?”
“No, a group is coming to study after my shift. Well…” looking at the floor in shame, “If that’s alright?”
“Of course. That one kid sure can eat.”
Tasmina laughed. Knowing he was trying to get her in a better mood. “Yes he can. He was excited about coming too.”
“Then off you go.”
Takoda and Sage, her Alpha, were the only ones outside of Council that really knew about her past and not all of it. They gave her more space than most in the pack. She would get annoyed with it but today she was glad.
Unable to avoid the visiting wolves, Tasmina tried to ignore them when not waiting on them. Many were watching her and scenting her. It was nerve racking to say the least. She had been trained from a very young age not to make eye contact with others but she still felt them and scented them.
“Hey!” one yelled.
Slowly walking over she took a glance up at the male. It was one she knew, “Hello Elijah, sir. What may I get for you?”
“Always formal. I’d like a steak medium rare, a salad and a cold draft.”
“I’ll get it right away.”
Looking with a tilted head, “Is something the matter dear one?”
Fear crept over her, she thought she was hiding it well. “No sir.”
“You can not lie little one.”
Looking to the table full of males, “Just a bit uncomfortable.”
“Yes, I have seen them watching you. Do you not wish for one?” Shaking her head vigorously. “I will take care of it then.”
Watching Elijah get up she turned toward the kitchen to place his order. When she came out to check the tables the males adverted their eyes the second she was in range. Tasmina hadn’t wanted to get them into trouble. Now they would certainly cause trouble. She walked filling glasses with water and coffee. When the cook called her up she was worrying again.
“Here you go. I hope he cooked it right. Is there anything else I can get for you?”
“No little one, this will be all.” She could tell he was scenting her emotions by the way her inhaled. “You are still fearful. Sit and explain.”
Knowing it was a command and she’d be punished for not obeying she sat. “Now please tell me what has you so emotional.”
“You told them to leave me alone, now they will make it hard on me and I’ll be an omega once again. Please don’t take it wrong. I thank you.”
“They will not retaliate. I told them you were off limits is all.”
Gulping the news, “They will think I am yours.”
“If it keeps a little one safe then I see no issue with it. I am here to find a mate but they must know you are much young for me. Too young to mate in my thoughts.”
“Thank you.”
“Now work and be at ease.”
Relief had washed over Tasmina after learning none of the males would bother her while they were there. If one knew she was off limits they all would very soon. It still bugged her that Elijah had insinuated she was his. The rest of her short shift went as any other, easy and she enjoyed talking with the regulars.
Elijah had smiled towards her as he had left. She almost missed it as her friends were walking in. Takoda had allowed Tasmina to reserve a table in the only quiet corner of the bar, so she walked them over.
“This seems to have become our table.” Jackson smiled. He was always happy and smiling. Nothing seemed to bother him. It was refreshing to her since her life had always been serious with very little fun.
“Yeah, Takoda set it aside for us tonight. We are really busy.

©2016 Jessica Markley

It's Time to Meet Naleena

Naleena is in for a major change. Here is the beginning.

Packing the final bag, Naleena’s excitement increased. Finally after weeks of arguing she’s leaving for Chicago to see her baby brother. Council, the three ruling males of all shifters tried to stop her but they had finally given in two days ago. She knew it was because her best friend, Dalara, a special wolf, had been kidnapped. Dalara was known as The Recessive to all shifters. She is coveted and has immense power. After she came back Council had insisted on everyone moving into pack houses of the Alpha house. That meant everyone living on Dalara’s property. Naleena had been raised to think she was human. That had all changed when Dalara learned she was not human either. It had taken time to get her mind to believe in all the supernatural stuff. Even now her feelings for Takoda, her Beta and sorta boyfriend, were all over the place. Yes she had liked him fr a few years but they had only started dating a few days before she learned of everything. Nothing had been the same between them. Yes, they went out about once a week but that was it. Something between them had changed when Council insinuated they were to be married, mated. This trip was to get away from it all and to relax. Naleena had traveled all over the country the last few months checking in on all the North American packs.
Zipping the bag, Naleena walked down the stairs to the front door. Though she didn’t get far when Dalara stopped her.
“Sneaking away huh?”
“I just want out.” She knew Dalara understood.
“I know. Drive safe and come back quick.” With a hug she let Naleena leave.
The six hour drive was long but gave Naleena time to think. She had to keep what she was secret from her brother. Council said he wasn’t to know any of it. Again she tried to tell them he wouldn’t say anything. In the end she gave in to their order. It might not be too hard. She had figure out what to say about her work. The work she was now doing for Council, translating very old Latin to current English and traveling. Just so he doesn’t ask what she does when she travel. That wasn’t going to be an easy answer.
Sooner than she thought she was pulling up to her brother’s new apartment building. Tristan must have been watching since he was at her door as she turned off the car.
“Wow! Where’d you get this beauty?”
“New job, more money.”
He grabbed her bags as soon as she popped the trunk. She followed him up two flights of stairs . When Naleena walked in she found the place spacious and clean. Something that was unusual. Tristan had always had tiny one room apartments. “How can you afford this place?”
“I took a second job.” He turned and smiled, “Don’t worry I aced all my classes.”
“Good. Did you tell mom you moved?”
“Yes, and heard how I need to settle down, stay with a job and find a nice girl to give her move grand-babies.”
“She never stops. I hear I’m getting to old not to be married and have three kids.”
They both laughed. Their sister married right out of high school and has two kids. Their mother thought they all should have but college was more important to them than families. Tristan was almost done with his PhD in, of all things, Biochemistry with a minor in zoology.
“You’re done in December, right?”
“No, I’m done now. I just want to take Advanced Latin.”
“You never told me you took Latin. Why the hell did you keep it from me?”
“You’d say I took it because you did.”
“No. I like the idea.” Now only if he was wolf. It would make her job easier to have him help her.
“So lunch is pizza down the block.”
Silence was not a norm for them but as they walked they didn’t speak. She was getting used to scenting feelings and Tristan was nervous.
They ordered their pizza and she finally had enough. “What’s wrong Tristan? You’re too quiet.”
“Well, umm… it’s about your job.”
“What about it?”
“You’ve never told me what your doing.”
“Oh, well I’m translating books right now.”
“And the traveling?”
“Well, I check on rentals for my bosses. They have hundreds all over the country.”
“OH! I thought with that new car it was drug dealers you were working for.” A shy smile told her that he was feeling stupid to think that.
“NO, nothing illegal, I promise.”
Something caught her attention as the door closed. She looked and it was a man, no not a man a male. Sage had told her there was only one in Chicago and it was a female. The hairs on her neck were stand up and she got the chills. There was nothing she could really do without Tristan jumping in with more questions.
“What are you looking at?”
“Oh I thought I knew that guy.” She nodded over to the male.
“You saw him when we went upstairs. He lives across the hall. Just moved in. I think his name is Jim. He asked about you when I said I was waiting for you. I couldn’t remember the name of the town but told him you lived in southern Illinois.”
Naleena gasped. If someone was asking about her, they knew she was Sage’s. Why would he moved in just before she came up here, across the hall no less. He’d be able to hear everything.
“Are you okay sis?”
“Yeah, I’m just tired from driving. Would you mind if we called it a day?”
“It’s only two, but yeah. I rented movies and made sure I have plenty of popcorn.”
“That sounds great.” As they headed out the male waved to Tristan, but he stared at Naleena like he was pissed or something. She needed to talk to Sage or Council. This didn’t seem right. Knowing she needed to be away from the male to call when they got back to the apartment she went into the bathroom, locked the door, turned on the water and called Sage. She got voice-mail. Calling Drewdon he answered on the first ring. Damn precognition.
“Naleena, what is the trouble you have found yourself in already?”
“Drewdon, I can’t talk long. Sage said there is only a female here but a male moved across the hall from Tristan and was asking about me. He made me uneasy when we were at the pizza place.”
“No male should be there. Sage would have told you.”
“Maybe you were right and I shouldn’t have come.”
“Why do you feel that way?”
“I don’t know. I feel something bad is gonna happen.”
“Don’t worry, Sampson is just a few blocks from you.”
“What? You sent him after me, after you said I could go alone?”
“Amos is still out there. You are close to Council. I could not let you go alone. Sampson was to keep his distance and just watch over you.”
“Well, he should have seen the male then.”
“I shall call him. I will call you back.” Click.
Naleena knew she was going to be sent home. Splashing water on her face she went to watch movies. She couldn’t follow anything that was going on in the movie, she didn’t even know the first one was over until Tristan broke through her thoughts.
“What ya want to watch next? I’ve got Twilight and some horror flick the girl said was great.”
“Twilight.” Her voice sounded off and distant but Tristan had never learned to pick up on that.
Her phone rang making her jump. “It my boss, I’m gonna take it in the bathroom.”
Tristan gave her a strange look but said nothing.
“Drewdon.” Once the water was on she felt better.
“Sampson says it is not a male he knows. I would feel better if you moved to Council’s penthouse suite that Sampson is at.”
“And what am I supposed to tell Tristan?”
“That Sampson is your male and he surprised you.”
“No, Tristan knows about Takoda and me.”
“Then say he works with you and offered to share the suite.”
“Fine, whatever, I’ll think of something.”
“He will be there in moments. Do as he says.” Click. Naleena had always hated the fact Council never said bye but just hung up.
Now all she had to do was make up a story her brother would believe. Taking a deep breath she went to tell  Tristan.
“Sis, what’s gong on? You’ve been distracted. Who was on the phone?

©2016 Jessica Markley

Dalara Excerpt

Dalara Excerpt 

Here is a another look at my WIP (work in progress) Dalara! Hope you enjoy it.

Chapter 4

Sage walked into the room, pulling Dalara from her thoughts.
“Do you feel better now that you showered?” she asked him.
“Yes, thank you for letting me use shower.”
“I need to apologize to you. Last night you made you uncomfortable when I asked you to take my clothes off. I am sorry. I shouldn’t have put you into that situation. Especially after you were caring for me when you didn’t need to.”
“You didn’t.”
“I might have seemed out of it at the time but I wasn’t. I know that you felt it was wrong.” She said.
“Please Dalara, don’t worry about it.” Sage said wishing this topic was over. “Why don’t we get down to business?” Hoping that would change the subject.
“Alright.”
“I will have to make a business call here soon, but we should be able to get everything worked out and signed today.” Sage told her leaving it open to when he could call Zane.
“I have never done this before, how does it work? What do I need to do?”” Dalara asked.
Sage sat down with her at the dining room table and pulled out a stack of papers. “First, I looked everything over and making phone calls, it’s going to run about one hundred twenty thousand give or take a thousand. Zared still needs to measure the upper porch.”
“Ok, that’s fine.” She told him.
“No haggling or trying to get a cheaper price?” Sage was shocked. Everyone he had dealt with in the past had tried to get it done cheaper.
“Nope, when can you start? I know the weather is a factor.”
“We can start on the inside as soon as tomorrow. The outside will depend on the weather.”
“Oh! I thought it would be at least a month to get it going.” Dalara stated excitedly.
“It’s because you had a lot of the things done. I also had a thought about the upstairs. Do you ever plan on having this place open as a bed and breakfast?”
“I really haven’t thought about it, why?”
“If you do, you might like a kitchenette and a small laundry area at the end of the halls rather than more storage.”
“Wow, I would have never thought of that. What made you?” Dalara was even more interested in what else Sage may think about doing.
“Well, I have friends that live in large houses and always have guests. They ended up adding them to their houses a few years back.”
“I’m glad you’re doing this. You’re great with the suggestions. Do you have any more?”
“Yes, I thought that the bedrooms down here should share a joining bathroom rather than have to walk across the hall. It would be more private with just the two rooms sharing. Then we could make the one across the hall a half bath.”
Sage’s phone rang at the same time Dalara’s did. “I need to take this outside. I’ll be back when I’m finished.”
“Ok, it’s Naleena.”
Sage stepped outside the door and answered it as he made sure Dalara was on the phone with her friend.
“Hello Alpha Zane.” He said.
“Sage, I thought you would have called by now.”
“About what Alpha?”
“The female, Takoda and Zared have both called concerned. What is going on Young One?” Zane asked.
“I don’t know and for the record I was going to call when the female was on the phone with her friend. That way she would be distracted.”
“Fine, explain why I am receiving calls from your pack.” Zane ordered.

©2016 Jessica Markley

Dalara

Introduction to Dalara

Creation

In 4779bc six shifters were created; they could take any form. Wolf, leopard and panther were the ones they preferred. When they bred they had whatever species they were at the time of conception. Nathaniel, Vera, James, Abraham, Lorily, and Margret were their names. The Firsts could take any mammal form. Nathaniel lived the longest and was the most powerful of the six. As the race expanded they became ‘Council’, the ruling govern. They made laws and punished those who broke them, usually physical punishment.  Numbers have dropped and new wolves are not coming. Many abilities were lost since humans population increased rapidly.

Over the years powers and abilities have disappeared. Zacharius is the only one left with all but ‘True-Mate’ Sensing.


©2016 Jessica Markley

Back At It Finally

It had been over a year since I have posted here. I feel like I've been gone for over a decade.

The last year has been hectic and then some.

My son graduated high school last spring. He moved in with his dad, did 1 year of college and now decided to just work full-time. He has already gotten a raise in only 2 weeks!!!As of now I'm dealing with the fallout of his father trying to disown him. Yeah for me!
This year my little girl graduated middle school. In the fall my baby girl will begin her chapter of High School. It makes me feel old.

After my son moved out I had to move from a 3 bedroom to a 2 bedroom. Yep, that's right. I live in low income housing and 1 adult and 1 kid only gets a 2 bedroom, which I understand. I had to move on one of the hottest days last August. It about killed me. Now I'm in an apartment 2/3 smaller. I had to downsize a lot. After almost a year, we have finally settled in and I'm somewhat organized.

When my son moved out, quickly, I hadn't had time to adjust the loss of child support so I lost my internet and had to fork over a huge deposit for the 2 bedroom.

This month I finally am caught up and have enough stashed to pay 6 months of bills. That means internet too!!! It has been a long road but I have made it this far and my stress level has lowered.  Well, after yesterday.
Monday, I was to have internet. Well, the UPS driver decided, himself, that I needed to sign for the modem and he had come while I was gone. This, even after I called Friday to verify I didn't need to be here. I called the second I got home, they sent a message to the driver and he was not in the area. That meant I had to pay the neighbor to take me to pick it up. The office is 32 miles from my apartment.

When I got home I had to wait until 8pm. At about 8:30pm I plugged the modem and all that crap in....
It didn't work!
I call the internet company, they would send a tech out in the morning. So after waiting a year and getting my hopes up, I had to wait. These events sent me into a rage episode. I threw a bunch of things and put a whole in the wall AGAIN!
Tuesday morning the tech was here 9 minutes after the 9am-noon arrival time. In 10 minutes he had my internet up and running.
Guess what the problem was...
When they remodeled my apartment they hooked up all the phone jacks up backwards! WTF!!!
Friday he came back and replaced the jack. Hmm... still dropping internet for about a minute ever hours. Internet is still dropping out for a minute every so often which means the tech will be back on Monday to check the outside line.
I am online and getting back into my routine. Yes, I can live without internet in my home but once I was up and running a weight lifted off me. Probably because now my daughter won't complain all the time about not having WiFi.

Another thing that has me ticked a bit. My AC (air conditioner) leaks in the apartment and has since I moved in here last August. They have to replace the wall box it sits in. They ordered it finally two weeks ago. Guess what, it's back-ordered. So, last year I had to deal with it leaking cause I wasn't going to deal with the dry heat when we had it. This year wasps decided to build a lovely nest, so no AC right now. Luckily one of my neighbors let me stay in her apartment even when she's gone.

Working on @GetWordies writathon for CampNaNoWriMo next month. I can't wait to start my project July 1st. It's another project that has been haunting me for months. I'll be post excepts from past WIP (work in progress), Jasper's Mate, soon on my page 'My Writings'.