Parenting is hard enough, then you toss in mental illnesses with both mother and children . It's a storm waiting to happen, which it has hit this last 6 weeks.
As a mother of a 20 year old son & a 15 year old daughter I have instilled honesty, loyalty, faith in others, respect for elders and officers of the law. Or so I thought. 5 weeks ago my son ripped his ACL. I dropped everything for 4 weeks; making sure he made his appointments, waited through his surgery, paid his bills (his money) and drove him 60 miles round trip almost every day for work. This messed with MY medication schedule a little. NOT a good thing when it must be exact. Being around him was hard too; he hasn't taken his medication for over 3 years and he tends to set my anger off quickly. I kept it under control 98% of the time. Yes, I snapped at him for forgetting his pain med schedule and not being ready to leave on time. I had to increase one medication to keep under control ; which I gladly did. It worked until week 4.
I found out my daughter had been staying at her boyfriend's house every weekend instead of her step-sister's. She's 15 and he is 20. Yes, they told me they had sex a few times back in November. I was upset but since they were honest and agreed not to do it again until she turned 16 in December I allowed the relationship to continue under adult supervision. I'm regretting that now. I yelled, yes yelled at them and grounded my daughter from data on her phone. Then her boyfriend told me she hadn't been taking her meds. She was so pissed that she got my dad and son believing that I beat her and said I was going to kill her. My dad and son had me committed to the psychiatric ward for a 48 hour hold saying I wasn't taking my meds and I was a threat to everyone, then the judge dismissed the case since my medication levels were perfect for what I was taking. They were not happy. My dad said "If you hurt her I'll hunt you down." While I was locked up, they called DHS (Department of Human Services... known to most as CPS and Social Services). They night of court a worker came by, the same one I talked to in September about my daughter's father). She asked the usual questions and said she needed to talk to my daughter. It took 2 weeks to get a hold of her. In this time the police said she was with my father. Come to find out she was staying with her boyfriend. DHS was not happy. They are pressing statutory rape charges against the boyfriend and custodial interference against my father and son. I'm good with it all. They need to understand that they must follow the law. My daughter will be home Monday after DHS picks her after Driver's Ed classes. She will be restricted to my house for 4 weeks. There will be no more contact with my father and son for her. I love my DHS worker, Stacy. She has been my rock through this. She has said that if all her clients were like me, doing everything needed and then some, her job would be much easier. Since I have nothing to hide I told her everything, even that I yelled at the kids, and allowed her to talk to my friends, the few I have. After she finally talked to my daughter, son and father; she told me that they were all lying and my daughter would be brought home. My stress level dropped 75% and my shrink decided I could lower one of my meds just a little bit, from 450mg to 425mg.
With all that said, my writing has suffered. I haven't written a thing since all this started. CampNaNoWriMo starts July 1st. I'm gonna push myself to get back into it. Though instead of my normal 50k goal it's only 25k. I'm not sure I can do it but I'll try. As punishment my daughter will be doing it right along with me but with a lower goal, probably 10k. She loves to write but doesn't much. I'm hoping the experience will strengthen our relationship. I have also set times for playing cards and just talking.
I have been re-reading Sookie Stackhouse:Southern Vampire (aka True Blood) and it calms me a bit.
SO, if you have a mental illness that needs medication and something in your life changes, please talk to you doctors. Changing dosages and added another med for a short time may help. If your and your child(children) have mental illnesses remember you can set each other off.
