Writing is Hard

As I write today I realise that it's not easy. I have 1 that needs editing like crazy and 3 that needs to be finished. Why can't I just stay focused on 1 of them. Yep, you guessed it, plot bunnies driving me in so many directions.
Excerpt from #WIP3

Tasmina didn’t know where she was going but she knew she had to get away from him. How could this be happening? Her life was just getting on track, school, being able to walk around without fear’ well much fear anyway.  It was a life she thought she’d never have after everything she’d went through as a pup. She had thought it was in the past, now he brought it to the front of her thoughts. Thoughts she didn’t want back. Once she slowed down she scented to see if anyone was following her, no she was alone. The only scent she found was that of the stream running through the land. Knowing the visiting wolves weren’t allowed there she sat down. Thoughts of Amos and the dungeon rushed back. Feeling as though she was in it she began to shake, sweat and fear was rolling off her. This was how it would be with Elijah. He was of old days, kept his pack in order with whippings. Another thing she was all too familiar with. Though the scars on her back had healed without the faintest line, her inner scars were there to stay. She can’t go through that again and she wouldn’t. If that went going anomic then so be it. She had left her tracking sense open to keep herself safe, now she scented a male within a few yards. One she wasn’t familiar with. Must be one of those looking for their true-mate, something she never thought of doing. Tracking his movement she sensed he moved in another direction, to a path that was further away from her. Wondering why others wanted to mate, she thought of how her parents had been. They were true-mates and died within six months of each other, she being only four. Memories of them were faint but she knew they loved each other with all they had. Pictures of them holding hands and smiling at each other when they thought no one was looking made her wolf stir.

(c) Jessica Markley 2014

See not my best work but it's the first draft so I'll go with it for now. Back to fingers flying over the keyboard. #WriteClub today. Hoping to hit 5k new words. More updates soon.

Holidays What Happens When You're BROKE!

As Christmas and Yule approach I get more depressed. I wish I could give my kids things they want. Once again; I can't once again. Another year where they get toothbrushes, dental floss, mouthwash, and their favorite meals. They don't need clothes or much of anything fancy. they asked for iTunes cards (I don't pay for their phones their grandmas' do) and Austin needs bedding. I want household items, gas money and money to buy my personal things. I have bought clothes, undergarments or stuff like that for myself in years.All extra money goes to the kids. As it should.

To say it's hard being a single mother of 2 teens is an understatement. I'm unable to work and child support from one father isn't cutting. With 1 car that's my kids and the van sitting waiting to be fixed (if I had the money) it's tough. Now that Austin is playing basketball again getting my other one home after school is getting harder. I'm a recluse as it is but having to depend on friends to get me to the pharmacy is nerve racking to say the least. Soon the internet will have to go. Heart-breaking as it is I can't really afford it anymore. It's my lifeline to my fellow supportive authors and my kids' way to play games and talk with their friends they left behind when we moved 5 years ago. When the internet is gone I'll have nothing, to Netflix (we have no cable), no writing support and my kids will be saying 'I'm bored' all the time. It's heart breaking I have no family left to help.

I asked for help this year for the first time and since my kids are teens they won't help. A group in facebook thought they could help but everyone said that since the kids didn't want much and they won't buy for me that they won't help either. The kids will get things from their fathers' sides.

Too add to all this Austin need his senior pics printed and I have to toss together his open house. His father said he'd do it but I won't hold my breath. He did however have his wife take the pics, which I ended up having to edit, she did a shoddy job. It's cheaper than have them professionally taken since that would be $300+ and it'll cost me $48. $48 I don't have.

My ex-mother-in-law (mother to the one not paying child support) has helped so much the last few years I can't ask her for any more.

So, you are asking yourself "What is she gonna do?" I have no idea. I'll probably just muddle through and wish for the best hoping the kids don't get too upset and write to distract myself from it all.

On the good side, I made it through November without breaking down and crying for days. I finished NaNoWriMo and started another novel though none of my others are totally finished.

I wish all of you a happy holidays and warm times with family and friends.

One Holiday Down!

With Thanksgiving done and over with I'm doing better than I thought. I wrote all day instead of being with family. Yes, I know holidays are to be spent with family, well you don't know my family, at least most of it. Plus I'm a bit antisocial and would rather be in my own little world with my characters. My kids had a good time with their other side of their families which I'm grateful for.

Those of you know me, I've started yet another #WIP (work in progress) since I finished and won #NAoNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) with just over 50k words. It's in the same series as the last 2 that aren't finished. #WIP1 is only 2 chapters away from being done and #WIP2 has a ways to go. The nasty plot bunnies decided I needed to jump to #WIP3. It's flowing nicely so I'm sticking with it for now. As those bunnies stop with #WIP3 I'll finish up the 1st once and hand it over to an editor. Then work on second. Hoping to finish by March plus have edits done to my YA (young Adult) #WIP that I started 5 years ago.
Remember that the excerpts I post here are ones unedited. There will be many changes in the future I think.

Here is an excerpt from current #WIP3
"She tossed and turned. The smell of woods and power lingered in her nose and mind. It was nothing she had ever really paid attention to. Scenting was the one thing she tried not to do. All she would scent was if it was male, female or human. When she finally fell asleep it wasn't a good sleep. Her dreams were full of fear, terror and pain."

Well, now it's time to tame those plot bunnies and get back to writing. Have a productive week.