News Years Day 2019!

2018 has ended and 2019 has begun. Many of us are looking back at what we accomplished in 2018 and what we want to accomplish in 2019. I'm no different, I have been looking back and to the future.

In 2018 I accomplished more than I thought I would with my writing. I finished CoT-1 and CoT-1.5. Two rounds of edits on CoT-1 and have several people reading it now. Letting others read my work was scary and I'm still very anxious to get their feedback. My shrink has read both I completed and she loves them, but she may just be telling me that to make me feel good. I have found a permanent title to my series, it will be Chronicles of Thamesonville. I have won both CampNaNoWriMo and NaNoWriMo 2018. My 13 year old neighbor girl won her NaNoWriMo through the Young Writers Program with encouragement from me. I think her winning made me feel more proud of her than myself.
I also completed my Goodreads Reading Challenge for 2018. 85 books in 365 days was more than I thought I'd get read with my mental acting up again.

I have found a way to connect with my daughter and she has opened up about everything. Being 17 now, it is not something I expected.

In 2019 I hope to complete the following:
1. Publish CoT-1
2. Write CoT-2 (started at 12:15am 1-1-2019) & CoT-4
3. Draw a map for CoT
4. Start a new series
5. Continue fighting for disability
6. Eat healthier-though salads every day already
7. Keep up with blog posts. Will talk about that later in this post.
8. Try and get outside more
9. Win NaNoWriMo 2019 & CampNaNo 2019 (both)
It doesn't seem like much to most people but you have to remember writing can take forever. CoT-1 took 6 years to get it to where it is. Add in the pressure of both CampNaNoWriMo and NaNoWriMo itself, writing is stressful.

New blog posts coming every week: 
"Indie Author of the Week"
I will be choosing independent (indie) authors who self publish or publish through a small company to promote. I will not receive compensation or free swag from any of them.
After Cockygate I found many new indie authors and I now wish to spread the word of others. I shall not be reading ALL of the books but using their websites, Goodreads and sale sites to gather information to pass along to you. Many of these authors have been recommended to me by friends and fellow authors. If you have any indie authors you wish to be featured post links to author website in the comments.

It's February!

As we enter into the second month of 2018, I'm looking at what is to be done. Being bipolar with anxiety and arthritis this month sucks. January I completed only a few tasks out of 25. I managed to read A book, cook meals, kept up with dishes and folded laundry when it was brought home. Things I didn't get done that NEEDED to be done: read 5 books, write every day, lose 2 pounds, cut back on soda, drink more water, cut down on smoking and staying calm when kiddo-2 acts out.

I know what you are thinking, I wanted to do more than I should have. Though I think all were reasonable. I'm not too upset I didn't complete January's to do list. This month will be better I hope.

Mental Issues
1. I went to therapy and just bitched about kiddo-2's behavior. Mainly the fact that when I try to remove myself from the situation she follows me, even outside. Therapist had no ideas for me, as usual.
2. I saw my shrink. We decided that I could go 2 months between visits rather than 1. I was also given the go ahead to wean myself off the primidone. That means dropping from every night to every other night for 2 weeks then off them completely. As I have said before my shrink has the confidence in me to control my meds myself. I tried to go off  keppra, but that didn't work well. That means I am staying on it. So far the primidone cut hasn't given me trouble.
3. I managed to socialize with my neighbor, lets call her P. P had an incident that I know will effect her forever. I went through it a long time ago. We hadn't talked much other than the hello in passing. Now we talk 4-5 times a week. She has bipolar, OCD and anxiety too.
4. I made several healthy dinners and made sure there was leftovers to take to my other neighbor, the shut-in. Lets call him S. S doesn't like being around anyone and he doesn't cook other than toss it in the oven crap. I just knock, he answers and I hand him the container. That's it. I go home... walk 3 steps to my door.

Writing
I didn't even come close to me writing goals. I started Midnight Whispers over and am stuck. I tried to edit Dalara and just couldn't get into it. I had hoped to have at least 10,000 words done. Though with everything going on I understand why. When I'm stressed I can't focus and I'm trying something new with Midnight Whispers. Oh, and I've been sick for 2 months or more. Now that I'm better focus should come soon.
Here is my February goals:
1. Re-setup Scrivener for Midnight Whispers
2. Write 15,000 words of Midnight Whispers.
3. Edit at least 2 chapters of Dalara.
4. Get Inevitable Destinyz off to a beta reader & editor.
5. Research self-publishing again
6. Get Aeon Timeline set up for Midnight Whispers


Reading
I finished "When Darkness Comes"  by Alexandra Ivy. It's the 1st in her Guardians of Eternity series. I have read it several times and I love it more each time. This month I plan on reading the next 4 in the series.

Other Goals
1. Make freezer meals (Feb. 2nd & 3rd)
2. Cut down o soda
3. Drink more water
4. Keep the living room clean
5. Crochet a bit

That seems a lot but it really isn't. I know if I set my mind to them all I can get them all done. Remember, when setting goals make them small and simple. Even 1 small thing completed will make you feel better.

The New Year

Today is the first day of the new year. Many are planning on making changes in 2018 & hoping for things to change n the world. No matter what we do 2018 can be a start of something different. I have never done a New Years Resolution but this year I'm going to try.



Writing/Reading

• Write 150 words daily (2017- 250 words)
• CampNaNoWriMo - April & July 25k words each (2017 completed)
• NaNoWriMo- November 50k words (2017 completed)
• Blog at least twice a month
• Goodreads Reading Challenge 100 books (50-100 yearly & make it)

Eating Habits

• Eat healthy with more home-cooked meals (2017- too much pizza & chips)
• Cooking- Make crock-pot freezer meals every month (2017- Only 2 months)
• Drink more homemade fruit infused water (2017- drank too much soda)

Hygiene/ Mental Health

• Take showers every other day (2017- bathed every night but washed hair once a week)
• Take medication every day (2012-2017 completed) Medisafe app helps
• Keep all therapy & shrink appointments (2015-2017 completed)

Cleaning

• Do dishes every day (2017- once or twice a week)
• Vacuum once a week (2017- twice a month)
• Fold laundry when it's done (2017- folded once a month)

As you can see my goals are not to hard for normal people. I'm not normal at all. With bipolar I have a hard time doing things like housework and cleaning. Add to it that when I don't clean for a day I get anxious and have no idea where to start or I start something (like dishes) and never finish them.

August & September Sucked!

I thought all my problems had been lessened, but NO! I've had more stress, rage & anxiety in the past 4 weeks than I have all year.
My son's grandmother got all pissed off because wanted to take a trip to Ohio from Christmas/Solstice. I was called every name you can think of, told I ruined my kids' lives and never to contact 'MY SON'. My son, the good man he is now, confronted her and she kicked him out. The next day after leaving me tons of nasty messages, she went to his work. Yep his work. Begged him to come back. He did but put a deposit down on an apartment before he did. She is now leaving messages saying that I ruined his life and he can't live on his own... Ha! He's 19 for crying out loud.
It took me weeks to realize that nothing was my fault and I raised a responsible, respectful young man.With that all settled, I will be changing my phone number when my son moves into his apartment the 1st of October. I have no need to contact her or vise versa.
My therapist told me I am doing the right thing. My shrink added another medication to help me sleep more since the one I was on wasn't helping.

That was all of August... now for September

My daughter came home last Sunday, didn't say one word to me the entire night. Monday she came home from school early because she was so depressed she couldn't stand it. After an hour she finally opened up and told me what happened. Her father told her & her sister that he was doing meth. Yeppers, meth. My 1st thought was why the hell did he tell a 18 and 14 year old this. Then the rage set in. I wanted to kick his ass into next year. I held it together until I was alone. My daughter and I talked about it all, how she was feeling, what options she had and what she wanted me to do.
I told her that if she and her sister wanted I would call the police, they still haven't decided. Though they agreed to have no contact with him. I called my daughter's therapist and she saw her Friday. Her therapist said I did everything and more than a mother should do. Since I had felt helpless all week this made my week. My daughter doesn't need medication right now and she talked about it.  I have to admit, I spoiled her most of the week. Made her favorite foods, cuddled with her and kept telling her that what her father was doing was NOT her fault.
The weekend got better because a guy I have been crushing on since I was younger came over and we had a great weekend.
This next week should be awesome, it's homecoming week here and my daughter is excited. They have different silly dress-up days all week and the dance on Saturday. It's her first year in high school so it's a big deal. I asked her if she was going with a boy. Her answer was, 'Why? I don't need one to go to a dance. I'm going alone so I can show them all what they are missing and will never have.' That's my girl.